Why are vampires so popular these days? Well, I could use this blog space to get into cultural beliefs or mythology, or perhaps debate about the recent insurgance of vampires into popular fiction. However, rather than go down that path, I thought I'd do a short and fun list of my five reasons that we love to love vampires. I did no research, I consulted no text, I just picked my own brain. Since that in of itself can get a little crazy, you'll just have to stick with me. Here goes:
- A vampire will never ask you to prepare a meal. Tired of the 'Hey honey, what's for dinner?' or 'We don't have anything to eat.' type of remarks that generally float around the average household day in and day out? I've got news for you. Vampires are self-sufficient. They never asked to be fed, they just fend for themselves. As long as they aren't looking for you or your immediate family to be the food source, then you're all set. Just send the vampire over to your in-laws'.
- A vampire will never leave the bed unmade. Tired of wrinkled, smelly sheets when you climb into bed at night? Well here's the 411. Vampires don't sleep! So look forward to odor-free, unwrinkled sheets at night. Unless of course you're leaving the bed unmade. In which case, well, you're on your own.
- A vampire will never fall asleep when you're talking to him or her. Ever been in a relationship with someone who's fallen asleep when you're talking to him or her. Well, let me tell you, I have. It just doesn't give you a warm fuzzy, if you know what I mean. Again, vampires don't sleep so you'll have a captive audience.
- A vampire will probably not have an unattractive bod. If you're a vamp, you kind of get ripped running around in the woods and darknened alleys looking for prey. Bonus if you're hanging with a vamp, because he or she won't have to fight that unattractive 'spare tire' that most of us fight to avoid. Bonus!
- A vampire will not break the bank on costly skin care products. Tired of watching your checking account decline as a result of expenses tagged 'Clinique For Men' or women for that matter? Vamps have awesome complexions, and, being the undead, your vampire probably won't have to shell out the big bucks to keep of appearances. Oh snap!
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For Lily Drake, slaying vampires is easy…Dating them is the hard part.
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